Two days ago, I delivered this note - "Folks, don't shudder.....no blogpost is attached. I have been seeing a general diminishing of interest in reading during the pandemic (very surprising, I would think people would read more for want of other forms of entertainment). Readership of my blogposts is no different. So, I thought we should all take time off. I, from spewing out my kind of stuff and you from suffering through those pages. This is a temporary pause - sorry to disappoint those among my readers who would rather see a permanent closure. Shall regroup after the new year, whenever spirits look up. Till then, taken care and stay well. Thanks. Varad"
When I sent out that 'excuse-me-for-now' note to all those to whom I usually and dutifully send my blogposts, I expected to receive some neutral responses from a few friends, tut-tutting profusely. Please note, I am carefully avoiding saying `sent to all of my readers' because while I surely send them out, reading them is obviously a choice and many might choose to swipe left to banish the posts out of existence. Believe me I am not complaining, not at all; instead I am happy that I have retained a large part of my reader-base (I am not disclosing how big that is!!) even after some 12 years of what some merciless recipients would consider a monthly nuisance. But, I am overwhelmed by the deluge of messages received in response, ranging from a somewhat dejected `Oh, No' to a solicitous`Varad, stay well'. In between there were many other shades of feelings I deciphered in the messages received and then this thought struck me. Why not make an absolutely unscheduled and bonus blogpost of this event before all of us take a break. I hope you don't mind!
A few people wrote with emotion, to convince me that their lives seriously depended on reading my blog. That it provided the sustenance they require to wade through this existence without too much pain. That bereft of the `sahara' of my blog, they may struggle to make sense of their lives. I am, of course exaggerating, but there were quite a few like that. If I were a sucker for good words, I would have immediately felt the weight of my ego growing on me and would have readily imagined I have gained a halo too!
Then there were those who completely ignored what I said was the reason that prompted me to opt for the break - that readership has reduced somewhat and generally people seem to be reading less and less; I perceive some fatigue in the masses! They precipitously concluded that something is terribly wrong with my psychological or at least physical health and assembling a few decent sentences successfully as I used to, is for now beyond my capability. So those questions have come in a flurry - `Are you okay, please take care'; `Hope whatever is wrong does not affect you much, God bless'; `Praying for your recovery and return to blog-writing' and so on. So, I am gratified to see that some have at least read the `pausing' message even if they do not habitually read the blogs and what is more, responded too.
There is this group of `readers' (they do read the blogs, I know), who apologetically told me `Even though I might have missed a couple of blogs of yours, I promise I read all of them; so don't take the fall in readership to heart. Continue to strangle us with your words'. This group of friends was pointedly telling me not to place the guilt of diminishing readership at their doorsteps and they wanted to be absolved of that responsibility pronto. I am waiting for a few comments on some on old blogs from such people to reinforce this sentiment. That would definitely make me feel good.
Some others even went to the extent of questioning my judgement that less people were reading the blogs of late. They forcefully said that cannot be true - such reassuring darlings!! A few reasoned that just because people refrained from commenting, it does not mean that they were not interested in the blogs. They seemed more offended at the prospect of my losing readers than I myself would ever be! I am touched and with such a protective and massively encouraging group of people around me, I do not have to worry about ever becoming completely `reader-less'. And, if ever I want a trolling group from my readers to go after `non-readers' or anybody else, I know I can turn to this group of avid consumers to get the job done. Some small comfort.
One set of people advised me that even if many readers drop off, I should not bother about that and continue to write because others are going to be with me. They have taken the high moral ground, saying `you write - that is your karma, do not worry about who reads'. A couple even quoted Bhagavad Gita and readily assumed the role of Krishna to my Arjuna. I am truly humbled, friends. I am reproducing a message verbatim here - `Your writing does not need some dumb audience to justify its existence. Aap karm karte jao, phal ki chinta mat karo... Krishna says... also remember, ur writings will remain in ether for ever. There will always be a very long tail. Many great works got recognition many years of their creation..'. This writer has been a dear friend for a few years now and has just become dearer!!
A few sent emoticans like 😑,😒,😡,😢,😊 -- succinctly teaching me that one does not have to waste so many words in a blogpost to express something. I have made up my mind to one day write a blogpost with more emojis and less words. That day will also come, I am sure.
One well-wisher just asked `Are you travelling'? Many just said neutrally `Take care, Varad'. This is the group which knows me well enough to have decided that nothing could be wrong with the chap, `he is just sparing us temporarily, God bless him and let us leave him alone'. A few said with glee that this short message was even funnier than a full blog, may be thereby obliquely suggesting that I should restrict myself to short messages!
Net, net -- I am glad I sent out that excuse-me-for-now note. It has given me the rather unexpected opportunity to write a blogpost on next to nothing!! In the process, I got to know my readers better and also saw a groundswell of support for me (if not my writing), which is very comforting. I thank all my readers (and non-readers) for sustaining me for 12 years and reassure you I am not going away! And it is not that I cannot write a few more pages every month, but it is just that the author senses that the reading public needs some space and a break. I respect that a lot.
Au Revoir, not good-bye.
